A game introducing Vabras to the universe. Vabras played by User:Holbenilord, while User:Pinguinus multitasks as the GM.



You are on a small country road, probably in England. Your ship is behind you, crashed beyond repair. To the north, you hear the tell-tale sounds of a city. There are gentle sounds of birdsong from all other directions.


Small country roads are pretty. Don't see many of them any more.

Vabras heads north, towards the settlement.


I'm assuming you're using the Blend In ability? You pass a sign that reads "Now entering Godfrey town limits."

A car stops by you, and a man pokes his head out. "Need a list, guvnah?"


Indeed. Strange name for a town, and strange sign overall :P Generally it's just "Welcome to CATFORD please drive carefully".

"A lift would be nice!"


FYI, that's a real sign in Missouri. Never been to England, so I don't know what the signs are like there.

"Hop in. Where to, guvnah?"


Missouri signs have a high degree of waffle then :P (Also, there's a town in Lincolnshire called 'Spital in the Street'. Weird)

"Just to the town would be great."


"Sure thing, guvnah. But if ya don't mind me sayin, ya don't want to spend too long in dat there town. Rash o' nasty murders down there."


"Oh, what kind?"


"Shan't bore ya with the gruesome details. Hurry up if ya want a ride, I've got some important business dat needs attendin to."


"Of course." Vabras hops in.


The town of Godfrey is a mess; several buildings are on the point of collapse, and chalk outlines seem to be everywhere you look. "Here ya go, guvnah. Don't ya be sayin I didn't warn ya." Once you exit he drives away.


Vabras looks around, searching for a place to stay.


There's a "Bad Wolf Inn" which advertises free lodging for the first day of your stay. Business is evidently bad in this town.


Free things are good, so Vabras checks in. He asks the inn's owner about the murders.


"Haven't been here the past few weeks, have ya? Well, here's how it went, roughly. One night there was a pretty bad earthquake; it did a bunch o' damage to the town. After dat, a bunch of people started dyin- real nasty too, most of 'em disemboweled, decapitated, or both. Dunno what to think of it myself." It is now sunset; sleep?


Vabras thanks the innkeeper and goes to sleep, bat style!


The next day, a maid knocks on the door. "Mr. Jones? You have a visitor! Wants to speak with you, sounds pretty urgent."


Vabras assumes his blending in form. "Certainly. Send him in, please."


"A rather tall, unpleasantly pale gentleman enters the room. "Good morning, Mr. Jones. What brings you to this cheap little inn? No friend of mine should have to endure such quarters. Come, I'l bring you to my home." Something in his voice tells you it's not a request.


Vabras follows him wordlessly. Once out of the inn, he asks "who are you?"


"The man smiles. "A smart Krillitane like you, doesn't know us? I thought your people were well-travelled. Tell me, do you have any idea how much it hurts to be crushed between two very large rocks?"


"I can't say I do. It's never happened to me."


"Fall afoul of the Pattern and you might just get the chance. I want you off this little rock by tomorrow evening. I' hate to kill you cause I don't much fancy a war with your race but some things can't be helped. Get lost." The spot of ground you're on explodes, throwing you back about twenty feet and dealing 10 (h) damage. The man laughs. "Best hurry. The days are only 13 reklons here..."


(Fringe Crossover! Or not)

Vabras scratches his head. "That was uncalled for."


Drat, I thought I'd come up with an original name. :r

"Life isn't a formal celebration, Krillitane. Get lost." Two blocks of asphalt separate from the road and hover above your head.


"You don't have to be at a party to be nice to people." Vabras casually plucks the asphalt from the air and crushes it to a powder in his claws.


"While your child-like view of the universe is quite adorable, I'm afraid it's time our little game came to an end." He disappears into the ground, and a large, asphalt golem takes his place.

Asphalt Golem stats

Health: 220

Strength: 30

Armor: 20% damage reduction


"Oh, now that's just not cricket." Vabras takes off into the air, and flies around several metres out of reach. "If we were somewhere where you could procure guns, I might have found this a little fairer."


The golem's arm detaches and flies towards you. It hits you, doing 30 damage.


Vabras' expression becomes incredibly unimpressed. "Fine, fine, I'll go."

He flies off to find weaponry. Any about?


You tell me. How do gunstores work in England? In America, there's a three day waiting period with every firearm purchase.


(In Britain, guns are pretty much illegal. )


Hmm. Well, I'd let you find some weapons smuggler, but you're a little short on cash...

From above, the town seems even worse. Many buildings have fallen down, but in a perfectly symmetrical pattern.


Patterns, patterns everywhere.

I look for any farmsteads. Farmers are sometimes licensed to have shotguns.


There is an old, beaten-down farmstead outside of town.


Vabras pops over, and takes a look.


Sure enough, a grizzled old farmer with an AA12 Shotgun pops out of the farmstead.


Vabras blends in.

"A semi-automatic shotgun? That can't be right for your purposes. Are you sure you wouldn't like to trade it in?" He is going to try and persuade the farmer to give it up (using his high 7 influence)


"Trade it in for what? One of 'em fancy holo-devices?"


"Holo-device? I come from the... Department of Agricultural Armament. We aim to distribute appropriate weaponry to farmers across the nation."


"Department of Agricultural Armament? Bout time we had us one of those. What have ya got for me? Better be good for me to give up ol' Bangy here."


"But of course. We understand you need a multi-purpose weapon- one that can be used to deter intruders, apply lethal force, and cleanly euthanise elderly or injured farmstock. With that in mind, we plan to provide you with the Remington 870. However, you know paperwork- following your handing in of your current weapon, we would require 24 hours before providing you with your new weapon."


The farmer agrees to your proposal, and gives you the AA12. For the record, I know a lot of farmers, and not one of them would have really fallen for that, but I'm a merciful GM. :P


I can't think of any way to get a farmer to have really given up their gun like that, except at gunpoint, which defeats the point :P

Now armed, Vabras heads back into town.


There are many locations in town to visit; several bars, a grocery store, a small museum, and a geologist laboratory surrounded by electric fences and armed guards.


The grocery store seems like the nicest place out of those. He goes there.


Nothing of interest except Missing posters and some free cheese samples.


Vabras studies the posters and tries some cheese.


Mainly geologists. They all disappeared the night of the earthquake.

Cheese has low stats, so I won't make you roll.


So, this laboratory. Vabras heads over there, flying over the fence and attempting to avoid notice.


You avoid notice, coming to a back entrance. You can hear assorted hisses and shrieks coming from deep within the lab.


A party? There's only one way to find out. Vabras moves in.


You find a small, pitch-black lizard with three red eyes. It scowls at you.


"You know what would be great? If you could talk."


A familiar gentleman steps into view, and the lizard scampers to his shoulders and starts cooing. "You can't expect a hatchling to speak so early in its life. Now. What are you doing here?"


"Oh, I just came in to see the scientists."


"We ate them. There's nothing left. Get lost." Two Asphalt Golems rise from the floor.


Vabras shoots the pattern. Three hits, each doing 84 (k).


The Pattern man falls to the ground... dead. The golems collapse into dust, and an alarm sounds.


He grins and flies up to a vantage point.


5 enormous black lizards storm into the room. Blocks of granite separate from the walls, and begin moving towards you. 10 more golems are formed.


Vabras takes off and circles out of arm-throwing range.


A pillar of solid granite erupts from the ground in front of you; roll 3 or higher to avoid collision.


That's a very tall pillar of granite. I roll a 3!


You're back on the outside of the laboratory, and your fight has drawn the attention of the gurds. They point assorted automatic firearms at you...


Going for the Blend In as a government-type. "Automatic weapons are illegal in the UK! Would you like to explain how these have come into your possession?"


The guards look confused for a moment, but you don't have time to gaze on their dumb faces. Another Krillitane is flying towards you, claws outstretched.


Sighing, Vabras shoots it with the AA12. Two hits, each doing 84 (k).

He shouts to the guards. "Quick! These things are attacking the lab!"


"These things hired us to guard the lab from other humans." They point their guns and prepare to fire.


"Oh, come on. They don't even have any local currency." Vabras ducks behind a wall, deblends, and steps out again.


You are on the ground at this point, correct? Not in flight?


I think so


Good. A number of stone spikes project from the ground, positioned at angles so as to make a cage. You are trapped; one of the Pattern-lizards strides closeby, and makes a hissing sound possibly synonomous with laughter.


"This is the silliest prison I have ever been in."


A sub-spike juts out of the cage and stops just short of your throat. The Pattern-lizard laughs again. "We have you, Krillitane. Cease your mockery or your end will be even more unpleasant than it needs to be." It reaches out and grabs your gun.


"Not Ol' Bangy!"


It jerks Ol Bangy out of your hands and brings its three-eyed face close to yours. "Infantile little creature. Who sent you here?"


"Can't say for sure. I received a message on my spaceship, but the only words I could make out were 'Emergency' and 'landing'.


"Nonsense. If that were true, you would not have tried so hard to destroy us. What do you want here? What would you gain from our destruction?"


"Oh, I don't want to destroy you. You seem like nice people. I'm just impulsive."


The Pattern-lizard raises a claw to destroy you, but is stopped by another. They speak quietly for a moment, then one comes to speak with you. "You are a passing good warrior to have killed Letrochnariqeruv and our Krillitane. We have... certain enemies on this world. They must be cleared out for our plans to succeed. If you help us with this, we will help you grandly."


"Alright. Whadya need?"


"In the city of London there is a Raxacoricofallapatorian of the Blathereen family. He is currently posing as a lawyer named Samuel Bowditch. Bring us his head, and you will have your reward."


"Sure. When can we start?"


"Now." The spikes retract into the earth, and the lizard hands Ol Bangy back to you.


"Off I go, then!" Vabras takes off, and heads towards London.


You arrive on the outskirts of London. Now, you must find a way to locate "Samuel Bowditch"


Vabras flies into an empty house, locates a computer with internet access, and searches the man. Lawyers have websites! :P


You find and learn that he lives in a good-sized house but a few blocks away.


Vabras goes there, all stealthily.


You arrive at a good-sized house. The windows and various doors are sealed tight and locked; the only way in is through the front door.


Is there a chimney, or any breakable windows?


There is a breakable window.


Vabras breaks it and enters the building.


An alarm sounds and a woman screams from an adjacent room.


Sighing, Vabras searches for this Bowditch fellow.


An obese, middle-aged woman rushes towards you with a large book, and attacks you with it. You can see a flashing blue light in a nearby room.


Vabras ignores her, and goes to the light.


You arrive just in time to see a human skin suit falling off a large Raxacoricofallapatorian. It reaches for a compression rifle...


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